Like an Equal

I've been thinking about my dad quite a bit lately.  We all have certain days that can be more difficult than others.  Last Thursday seemed to be one for me.  Sundance named a new run and I came across an old trail map that was hardly close to what it looks like now.  I couldn't help but think what dad would think about all that and how I'd love to show him what I'd found.

Part of the reason of thinking about dad is that I'm coming up on some more decisions and events in life and I usually took the opportunity to counsel with him about those things.  He encouraged me to take great opportunities and helped me see things from a different perspective (even if it was just his perspective).  As I pondered about this, I couldn't help but say, "He always treated me as an equal... and I wasn't even close."

Dad was coming up on 44 when I was born.  Before I was even thought of, he'd had twice as much life experience as I: family life, education, work, marriage. Even then, he raised eight boys, advanced in his career, retired from that career, took on responsibilities as a grandfather and more callings as a member of the Church.  He's the one who taught me all I scarcely know about manhood, the outdoors, leadership.  At some point - I don't what it was - I felt that he looked at me, talked to me, and treated me like some kind of equal.  I don't feel that I really ever deserved that.

He would listen to what I had to say.  More than that, he would value what I had to say. "I'm proud of you, son," he'd even say on occasion.  Well, dad, I'd sure love the chance to talk with you more right now.  I only hope that I could get you to say that again about me.  I love my dad.  I have a hard enough time treating my equals like my equals.  I pray that I'll remember how he treated me and hope to echo that in my life.  Thank you dad.

Dad's Art

Lest anyone think we were kidding about the packing for long road trips...

Our Dad

John LeGrande Avery died at his home in Provo on August 10, 2013, after an eight month battle with brain cancer.

John was born in Provo on October 7, 1942, to Floyd Faye and Sadie Hulet Avery. He is survived by his wife Pamela Cardon Avery, his eight sons and six daughters-in-law – Matt & Nicki, Brian & Chris, Danny & Staci, Peter, Andy & Sarah, Wes & Melissa, David & Jannet, and Alex – and 22 grandchildren. He is also survived by sisters Ara Jean Hiatt and Sue Swain, and brothers Barry and Con. He was preceded in death by one sister, Dena Joyce, and one brother, Chad.

John (or LeGrande or Bud) served two years as a missionary in New Zealand and continued to serve faithfully in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints his entire life in a variety of callings, most recently as an Executive Secretary in the Spanish Fork Young Single Adult Stake. He had a firm belief and understanding of the Boy Scout program as it related to the LDS Church. He influenced countless young men as a Boy Scout leader, helping many of them achieve the rank of Eagle - including his eight sons. He received many scouting awards including the Silver Beaver Award, one of the BSA’s highest honors. He loved making itineraries and lists and repacking cargo space prior to and during any outing involving a vehicle. He had a love-hate relationship with long road trips. Driving erratically fast (but amazingly avoiding any consequences) was his specialty.

Dad ‘s professional career was in Computer Engineering, but he preferred to spend his time in the outdoors hiking, fishing, camping, skiing, backpacking and bicycling.  He was skiing when symptoms of the cancer were first noticed. He was also a faithful BYU fan and enjoyed a long tradition of attending football and basketball games with his family.

John received wonderful care and attention from the staff of Horizon Home Health and Hospice for several months. We thank them all, along with his doctors Reichman, Gaufin, Clark and Rich.

Funeral services will be held on Friday, August 16, at 11:00 am at the LDS Chapel at 4056 North 650 East, Provo, Utah (the “Red Brick” building). A viewing will be held on Thursday, August 15, from 6:00 pm to 7:30 pm and prior to funeral services from 10:00 am to 10:45 am at the same location.  Interment will be at the Orem Cemetery.

March

 Did you know that Dad skied again on a sunny day in March at Park City?

 Well, he did. Thanks to the National Ability Center, he was able to take a final run and feel the pure joy of carving a turn or two.

Also in March, we got to go down south again. It was not the usual roughin' it in the desert like he loved, but we rented a house and got into Zion. He got to watch his giant family enjoy nature like he taught us for years and years.

We love ya, Dad.

Basketball

Special thanks to Tom Holmoe who was very gracious to let us use his seats at tonight's BYU Basketball game.  Dad has always shared high praise for President Holmoe and we got to see his kindness first hand.

Dad would take us to a lot of BYU sporting events, and we've all shared some great memories at the Marriott Center.  We got to take it all in as BYU beat Utah State.  So thanks again for making it happen.  (Mom joined us a bit later at half time).

To update on other things, we've been doing the radiation and chemotherapy for about three weeks and dad's been doing very well with them.  He's been able to get around just fine with the walker and is in pretty good spirits.  He has a couple more weeks with this round, so we are still doing lots of activities, etc.  

It's been great to have a lot of visitors and we all love you for it.

United We Fight

Well, it's on! Dad finally started the big gun treatments today.

This is a fight!

The MRI two days ago revealed that the tumor is now bigger than it was before the surgery one month ago. Our dad is having significantly greater challenges than before. 

He knows that there are tons of people out there hoping, praying, thinking about him, and loving him.

He feels it, appreciates it, and probably loves you, too. 

Please keep it up. If you have 5 minutes to stop by, do it!

But maybe really keep it to 5 minutes or so.

Send a card. Bring a photo. Share a memory.

If you can't be here, write a comment below, we'll pass it on!

Here we are showing our dad support. 

Mom's picture should be the biggest here. (even though she didn't buzz her head:)

Strength
Hope

Happiness

Gratitude

Child-like faith

Skiing is fun

Here's a little bit more about our trip to Sundance Resort on January 19th.

We all got suited up - some for the first time in quite a few years - and even got to help dad, partly to make up for the hundreds of times he had to force our feet into them boots.

 Here is dad after just getting on Ray's Lift.  Andy used a safety harness to make sure he'd stay on the lift.

 You have to take in the phenomenal view of Mt. Timpanogos when you're up at Sundance.

 Made it safely off of Ray's and on to Arrowhead. (Video to come soon)

We didn't get to capture Brian as he unloaded from the lift.  At least it was in sacrifice to get dad safely over to Bearclaw Cabin, but he still had the only fall of the day.

 Here are a couple views of the Utah Valley soup bowl (that inversion makes for some crazy haze).

 Just a few shots of hanging out outside Bearclaw for a few minutes.  (see the other post for a shot inside)

After having lunch, we took to the slopes.
But first dad got packed up in the toboggan by a few Sundance Ski Patrol members.

 Matt took a few shots of the scenery down Bishop's Bowl, but I only included one.

Here's just one shot of dad in the middle there, riding down in the toboggan (I had to look that word up so many times to make sure it was spelled correctly).